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    1. C

      Update and need prognostications

      Finger wagging from Stealth2 As much as anyone can wag a finger at me for poor choices regarding who I dated and getting pregnant, people do change. Believe me, I wag my finger at myself more than you can Stealth2. So I dated a loser and got pregnant. How dumb could I be? I hate that that...
    2. C

      Update and need prognostications

      Good suggestion I worry less these days about unsupervised visits since dad is clean and appears to be more mentally stable than before. He still has an anger problem but says he is willing to get anger management help. If he gets help, I would feel safer dropping the restraining order. Your...
    3. C

      Update and need prognostications

      One more thing...an impression ...so I am getting the impression that perhaps I should settle out of court? Tell my ex "Okay, joint custodies are fine. Since I should never have had a child with you, and should have ran from you when you I found out your history of battling drug addiction...
    4. C

      Update and need prognostications

      Drug history P.S. My ex's drug history of 12 years is very clearly mentioned in the psychiatrist's records which were subponaed (sp?) in court. I didn't have to say a thing...it's in his medical/psych records.
    5. C

      Update and need prognostications

      Truth I do not consider what you are saying to be rude. Yes, the man has a history of battling addiction. When I discovered I was pregnant, he promised to quit and he did. He quit but started using again after our son was born. During this time, he told me he was not using but now admits...
    6. C

      Update and need prognostications

      Visitation I am not trying to stop visitation. I do believe it is in the best interest of my child to have both of his parents in his life. But I think my son has a right to be safe with stable parents. I pushed for monitored visits based on my ex's lifestyle and jeopardization of our son in...
    7. C

      Update and need prognostications

      What is the name of your state? Ca I'll try to keep this fairly brief. I left my addict/mentally disturbed husband after escalating verbal abuse, threats and illegal activity (he was trying to grow pot in our baby's closet and took our son on a drug run). My son and I have lived away from him...
    8. C

      "Huggies, Ultratrim" Choking Hazard

      Walmart brand (not legal comment either) Yup...I use that Walmart brand too...yellow package and their called "Dri-bottoms". The tabs (plain old plastic tape tabs) are pretty secure in my experience and may be a better option for many moms opposed to diapers that pose a choking hazarad.
    9. C

      "Huggies, Ultratrim" Choking Hazard

      I've had that happen too... I know exactly what you're talking about.... Huggies uses those velcro "flex-tabs" that stretch to make the diaper supposedly more comfortable for the child but, you're right. I've used diapers like those (and Huggies isn't the only brand that is designed like...
    10. C

      Who pays for monitored visits?

      Duty of a mediator Yes, it is also my understanding that it is the mediator's responsibility (duty by law?) to report any child endangerment/potential for child endangerment and domestic abuse. I'll get the report on Monday...we'll see what the moderator said and I'll report back.
    11. C

      Who pays for monitored visits?

      Wow. I didn't even think that he could stand to lose all visitation. We weren't even proposing that, only supervised visits. He DID admit to the mediator about taking our son on a drug run. As he so eloquently put it to the mediator, "The kid was asleep the whole time in the car. It was a...
    12. C

      Who pays for monitored visits?

      What is the name of your state?CA I'm pretty sure that my drug-addicted, abusive ex is going to get supervised visits after he admitted everything (including taking our son on a drug run) in mediation. The mediator made it clear that she was making a supervised visits/help-for-ex recommendation...
    13. C

      Confused and a bit suspicious...

      What is the name of your state? CA My husband and I recently attended a mediation session in which the unimaginable happened...he told the truth! He admitted that he is battling a drug/alcohol problem, he admitted that he was diagnosed bipolar and prescribed medication that he isn't taking, he...
    14. C

      Mediator's influence on judge's decision?

      Hmmm.... ....I don't know if there is a difference. Our mediator appt. was at the courthouse with a court-appointed mediator who made it really clear that she was passing a recommendation to the judge.
    15. C

      Mediator's influence on judge's decision?

      Oooohhhhh... That makes sense...I thought she was required to make a report no matter what but I guess that she meant in context of whether or not we were able to agree upon a parenting plan/our agreements and disputes. She made it really clear that she was going to make a recommendation...
    16. C

      Mediator's influence on judge's decision?

      What is the name of your state? CA My ex and I went to mediation yesterday. He admitted everything in mediation. He admitted he was abusive to me. He admitted that he has a drug/alcohol problem and that he was diagnosed manic-depressive. He signed releases for his medical files (that's important...
    17. C

      I think I made a grievous error.

      She just gladly answered me The lady just answered me gladly. Turns out she had a very good perspective of him at the time...as she put it, "he was a time bomb waiting to go off, agitated all the time" and an "emotional wreck". Whew, I feel relieved now. I felt so sneaky asking her and scared...
    18. C

      I think I made a grievous error.

      Reasons for asking her I should add that we are going to court this month. He is asking for joint custodies, child support (although our son has lived with me for almost 8 months now), alimony and for the court to order to me to pay his legal fees. He also is asking for a temporary order to...
    19. C

      I think I made a grievous error.

      What is the name of your state? CA I have been contacting family, friends and professionals who have any recollection of the timeframe in which my soon-to-be-ex-husband had a "nervous breakdown". During that time, he was heavily drinking, using drugs and being abusive. I just contacted a woman...
    20. C

      Ex wants me to pay his legal costs

      I'm in CA. Under what conditions does a judge order the opposing party to pay legal costs in a divorce case? My ex is asking that I pay his legal costs since I am "in a better financial situation than him".

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