hospitalization help please

[LdiJ]

Brief update, even though there isn't much to say...

We are still in PICU. The X-Rays aren't getting too much better. When son woke up this afternoon, he sounded worse than he did 2 days ago. He is also running a slight fever. 1 step forward, 2 steps back it always seems.

Dad never called or showed yesterday, and I have yet to hear from him today either. No more calls or messages from wife or her buddies.

A group of folks from my Aunts church came up today and prayed with me. They also brought me two rolls of quarters and a nice little toiletry gift set. And they brought kiddo a super cute Teddy bear and a set of pajamas. Such a sweet and thoughtful group.

I am emotionally exhausted.

Wiley, I've previously blocked several of wife's Myspace accounts, but she seems to create a new one every week. I can continue to block though.

I am sorry that things are not getting better, quicker. I agree with CJane that you should concentrate on your son and yourself and just forget about dad. He has clearly demonstrated HIS priorities.

 

[maryjo]

Know what? Stop texting Dad with updates. Concentrate on your kid and your life. He can contact the hospital if he's curious about his child's health.

Very good idea! When my ex and I first seperated and divorced I used to try and keep him up to date on everything involving out child. Then I realized he didnt really care. I quit telling him everything and for the most part, he doesnt ever ask. Made MY life a lot easier!!! If he wants to know something I will tell him and our son is old enough to offer information himself.

 

[frylover]

I haven't been able to check in till now as I've been on a retreat this weekend. I was hoping to hear better news about your little man. Keeping him in my thoughts and prayers.

As for Dad, I am absolutely floored that he has shown so little interest in his baby. I agree with the others who say quit texting him. I think you've gone above and beyond at this point. If he's interested he knows where to find you and his child.

 

[DawnPlusTwo]

Know what? Stop texting Dad with updates. Concentrate on your kid and your life. He can contact the hospital if he's curious about his child's health.

Thank you CJane.
I was tempted to text him earlier to let him know that Son was worse today, but really didn't want to deal with him and wife.

On the RARE chance he does call or text, should I not answer?

Its been a trying day. An adorable little girl in the next bed left for emergency surgery mid morning and hasn't come back. I'm not even sure what is wrong with her. She's one of the ones who I've never seen a visitor here for.

My fiancé brought my little girl up here to have lunch with me today. It was nice seeing both of them. Seems like its been forever. He was shocked I asked him to come up. I've been so adamant about him not coming out of respect for son's Dad.

I'm so glad that son isn't old enough to know what's going on with his Dad. And I cannot believe the way Dad is acting.

 

[LdiJ]

Thank you CJane.
I was tempted to text him earlier to let him know that Son was worse today, but really didn't want to deal with him and wife.

On the RARE chance he does call or text, should I not answer?

Its been a trying day. An adorable little girl in the next bed left for emergency surgery mid morning and hasn't come back. I'm not even sure what is wrong with her. She's one of the ones who I've never seen a visitor here for.

My fiancé brought my little girl up here to have lunch with me today. It was nice seeing both of them. Seems like its been forever. He was shocked I asked him to come up. I've been so adamant about him not coming out of respect for son's Dad.

I'm so glad that son isn't old enough to know what's going on with his Dad. And I cannot believe the way Dad is acting.

You should respond to dad if he texts or calls. You should also inform him if things really take a serious turn for the worst. Other than that, leave the ball in his court.

 

[maryjo]

Thank you CJane.
I was tempted to text him earlier to let him know that Son was worse today, but really didn't want to deal with him and wife.

On the RARE chance he does call or text, should I not answer?

Its been a trying day. An adorable little girl in the next bed left for emergency surgery mid morning and hasn't come back. I'm not even sure what is wrong with her. She's one of the ones who I've never seen a visitor here for.

My fiancé brought my little girl up here to have lunch with me today. It was nice seeing both of them. Seems like its been forever. He was shocked I asked him to come up. I've been so adamant about him not coming out of respect for son's Dad.

I'm so glad that son isn't old enough to know what's going on with his Dad. And I cannot believe the way Dad is acting.

I would tell him if he asks...but not before. And when he does I would keep things as clinical as possible. Just give the facts the way the doctor would and nothing more. In fact, in my own experience, I dont even communicate much more than through text messaging. I found it keeps things very simple. Short and sweet!

 

[DawnPlusTwo]

First, I want to thank you so much for your continuing thoughts. It means so much. I was going to try to PM this update to everyone but that proved rather difficult from my BlackBerry. So I am going to post here and relock this, but I really do welcome any PMs, its much easier to reply to one than send a new one.

Its Thursday morning and we are still in the PICU. Son hasn't gotten any worse, but also isn't getting any better. We were expected to be released Tuesday. No luck with that. It seems like everyday there is a new complication that keeps us from going home. I'm honestly grateful to be here because if there is an emergency, they know how to handle it quicker than I would.

Dad has still not seen kiddo. It has been over a month since his last visit, period.

My attorney has been unreachable since I spoke with her last week. Despite the 2 emails I sent, and 2 calls I put in, asking what I should do about the 64 (yes, 64) texts I got from Dad's phone on Tues and Weds. I was called every name in the book. How next time he gets to see kiddo, he is going to go file for full custody because I am obviously not responsible, since kiddo has been in the hospital for two weeks. My mom is even getting phone calls from Dad and paternal Grandpa. (gave dad my moms number a long time ago, in case of emergency). This is getting ridiculous. I tried to get calls and texts blocked, but according to my company the only way I can do so, is if the other person is within the same carrier. We have different carriers.

I wish I had better news to report. Thank you once again for thoughts and prayers. Very much appreciated.

Dawn

 

[DawnPlusTwo]

We are GOING HOME!

After 16 long nerve wrecking days here, Kiddo just saw the doctor and is being released today!

I have a laundry list of things to do. Son is leaving with a nebulizer and breathing treatments every two hours. He has scripts for antibiotics and Nystatin cream for his yeast rash(he gets a yeast rash after taking antibiotics). And he has to have a humidifier.

I'm going to drop kiddo with my mom for an hour, run to the pharmacy, run to the grocery store, home to move his crib to my room, back to pick up the prescriptions and then bring my baby home! I'm so so happy and scared at the same time. I have faith everything will be ok!

Thank you all so so so much for all the prayers, as well as advice. I am more grateful to all of you than any of you will EVER believe!

Just waiting on the release papers now, and Docs instructions, and the nurses are copying his records just in case!

And to Wiley, I just reread this thread, and have been meaning to ask how your pregnant daughter is? Hopefully all is well with her and she's been able to go home from the hospital too.

 

[txmom512]

Yay!!! SO glad to hear your little guy's on the mend! I can't imagine what these past few weeks must have been like.

If he has treatments every 2 hours, and all that, is that going to affect dad's visitation?

 

[Ohiogal]

Happy Happy news for you dear!

 

[DawnPlusTwo]

Yay!!! SO glad to hear your little guy's on the mend! I can't imagine what these past few weeks must have been like.

If he has treatments every 2 hours, and all that, is that going to affect dad's visitation?

If Dad takes his visit tomorrow, I plan to send his nebulizer and a packet of solution that goes in it. Its a cute little nebulizer. Looks like a panda bear. And has its own little travel bag. Antibiotics are only twice daily, so I can give him that before he goes to Dads and after he comes home. The script for the cream for his rash, will give me two tubes now and two tubes can be refilled. So I will send a tube with Dad.
Docs orders state that kiddo needs to be kept OUT of the weather. (its cold and rainy here). Kiddo is also supposed to wear a mask if he is around others that haven't been exposed to H1N1. Everyone in my family was exposed, but I don't believe Dad was. So I will also send some masks. Son is not to be around anyone with even a minor cold as he is still very vulnerable.

 

[CJane]

is this Dad's weekend? Can he be trusted to administer the treatments?

 

[DawnPlusTwo]

is this Dad's weekend? Can he be trusted to administer the treatments?

Yes, Dad has kiddo from 8a-6p tomorrow.
I don't believe Dad has Kiddos best interest at heart, but all I can do is hope that either his wife or paternal Grandpa cares enough to make sure he gets them. :-/

Doc said he really wants to advise me NOT send send kiddo tomorrow, but he can't override a court order.

 

[CJane]

Yes, Dad has kiddo from 8a-6p tomorrow.
I don't believe Dad has Kiddos best interest at heart, but all I can do is hope that either his wife or paternal Grandpa cares enough to make sure he gets them. :-/

Doc said he really wants to advise me NOT send send kiddo tomorrow, but he can't override a court order.

Bleh. At least it's a relatively short visit. You should set up a journal that has 2 hour increments in it and write down every treatment/medication administration from now til dad picks kiddo up tomorrow, and then send the journal with... see if he fills it in. At the very least, ask when the last nebulizer treatment was when he's dropped off so you can plan the follow up one.

Invest in some mentholatum or vicks too.

Also, one thing that's AWESOME in a humidifier (for future reference) is this stuff called Alkalol ( Alkalol - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia ) it was recommended by Wild's ENT Doc when she was suffering from chronic congestion. Dump a full bottle into the water reservoir and fill the rest with water. It smells good, isn't over powering and is awesome at helping with snot issues. LOVE IT.

I still use it every time the kids get schnurgly and when we get home from Mom's house because she smokes like a train and makes the kids sneezy/sniffly.

 

[DawnPlusTwo]

Where can I find the alkalol? I haven't had a chance to read the link yet.
Thanks CJane, those are great ideas. I may ask the nurse if I can get a couple of their blank pages that they've been using to monitor the treatments and meds. It will look more official and Dad won't think I'm keeping tabs hopefully if it seems to be for the doctors use or something, ya know?