sandyclaus
Senior Member
Ok. In order to do that, he would need to do things like complete parenting class, back pay on child support? And if he hasn't/didn't do those, would he still be allowed visitation?
I'm just figuring out every angle of what might happen...Honestly, I doubt he will ever step foot back in my son's life. I just worry.
Actually, none of the above - unless the court orders him to do it.
Visitation rights aren't a tit for tat. You don't pay for the privilege, so he doesn't have to pay the back child support in order to have the right to visit his child.
And as for completing a parenting class? Really? He's had 8 years to parent the child, and until he decided to divorce you, you didn't seem to have any issue with his parenting skills. His lack of parenting now isn't sourced from a position of inability, it's coming from a CHOICE not to parent. The courts aren't going to force him to take parenting classes just because you want him to jump through extra hoops if/when he decides he wants to have a relationship with the boy.
If you want to worry about something, then worry what kind of influence you are having on this child. Revolving daddies and men in mommy's life. Start dealing with what you're bringing to the table, and then be concerned with what your ex-husband is now obligated to provide (i.e., financial support, since he is the legal father now). Use your money to get your child - AND YOURSELF - some parenting and counseling classes to provide a more stable home environment for the child. And don't go running to your new husband and begging him to adopt your child because of your FORMER husband's choice not to do so.
(ETA: I'm kind of feeling like the whole revolving door with the men in your life IS more about financially supporting your child than the relationship with the man itself. New man = new bank account to pay for stuff. Kind of makes me want to side with the ex on how he's feeling about being treated that way...




